seriously...

I'm blown away how I have come to know such caring, concerned people in my life.

Three things all my relationships with people have in common:

1. My first impression of that person was eventually done away with. (The depth to an individual's character and peculiar growth is indescribable) And whatever new impressions I form of someone are constantly challenged.

2. They made/make the effort to love me for who I am and not for what I do/did.

3. They reached out to me first... and they're much better about keeping in touch than I am.

I read a psychologist's report stating that one of the earliest, most profound realizations a person makes as a young child is that other people are not like her/him. It's that realization I make every season and in every relationship, which deepens my understanding of love. Love of people, and ultimately, the amazing love of God. While I was at the greatest distance and difference from God, He loved me anyway.

I certainly don't deserve these people or their love. Not to say that any of us are without flaws, but this is where love grows. In the realness, nastiness, frustrations, rawness and creative weakness of people - the canvas in which God paints His grace.

seriously, it's not about me...

thank GOD!

ReConnect

Getting back to the US, traveling, and going through wedding season has been loads of fun. And it also has been an important time of reconnecting with people.

I've been terrible about "keeping in touch" with people. There are friends I've made who, after a while of not keeping in touch, those relationships just slowly fade - even to the point where I struggle just to remember their name on first glance! I've wrongly assumed that the relationships I have with people will remain and maintain themselves, somehow, automatically.

Even going through my Facebook "friends" is a testament to this. How many FB "friends" do you have on your list, but when looking back, you realize you don't even remember half of them or haven't talked to them in a long time? My aim is not to stay close with every single person I ever meet or be Mr.Popular, but keep in touch with those I've built significant relationships with.

A friend recently told me that "Well, that would make you a typical guy, Joe."

Yea, maybe. But I've decided I'm not giving into that.

Keeping in touch with people is kind of like the way I learned to march in the Marine Corps. On longer marches (can be more than 10 miles at a time), we'd sometimes just get in one long, single-file line and trudge along at a 3mph pace. If one person in that line loses track or starts slowing down, then the whole line starts to fall behind, bunch up, and get stretched out. That's not good, because on a march, we're on a mission. If the line gets too spread apart because Marines are getting too tired or complacent, then when there's a need for the Marines to gather together quickly, it takes more time and effort to do so versus when everyone is keeping the line and formation tight all along the way.

We even have a "ditty" to ensure we're keeping the line well-connected:
The leader will shout: "AT&T!"

Everyone else: "Reach out and touch someone!"
(everyone runs to grab the Marine's shoulder in front of them - sometimes it requires a lot of sprinting to catch up).

The group is always moving forward - it takes hard work to continue on with the mission. The less focus we have in keeping close to each other, the harder we have to work to "catch up".

In the same way, relationships are too important to just sideline - growth isn't automatic! It takes a real mutual effort for relationships to progress. Simply, as people change, the relationship between both parties must change as well. Otherwise, there will be a disconnect that will only get wider and wider with time and neglect.

It's been a great month of "catching up" with family and friends. I am committed to reconnecting with people I've lost touch with and keeping in touch with those I love.

ReLax

Last week, I got all my traveling done. I flew into New Jersey to see my family and a couple of friends, flew into Seattle for friends' wedding, stopped by Chicago to catch up with some folks there, then got back into Ann Arbor. It was just awesome catching up with family and friends. A lot has changed and between some friends, we had to get to know each other all over again. I'm starting to understand the significance of what Abe Lincoln said: "Never fall behind on your correspondence".

Although traveling to four cities and three different time zones across the US in 9 days was exhilarating and tiring, it was actually refreshing. The key thing that set the pace of my trip was the message I heard on Sunday, the morning after I landed in New Jersey.

The message preached was on the importance of rest - not just doing other things in place of our usual busy-ness, but real rest.

It's been over one month since I returned to the States and I was eager to get back into the swing of things. I should've taken the advice I received and eased into transitioning. I jumped right into serving. It was good on one hand, reconnecting with lots of people, but it was just too much and I definitely overestimated myself.

It was as if I had been used to running at 100 feet above sea level where the air is nice and dense and thick. Then, I was suddenly transported to 1,000 feet above sea level and was trying to run at the same pace in the thinner air - it's much more difficult to do.

The past couple of weeks, though full, have been much better. I've had the opportunity to just rest and relax. A good friend told me recently a good piece of advice: "Try to set a pace of life and ministry in which you can see yourself going for the next 10 years."

That doesn't mean complacency and a stagnant life, but one that is focused and full.
Learning to make the most out of every opportunity, especially the brief moments of rest.

ReAffirm

A dozen Facebook photo albums and a million words still would not do justice to what I've learned and experienced in my year overseas planting an international church. But I'm certain I will regularly reference my year in Indonesia through future posts.

I am back in the United States. Back from one year spent in Indonesia.

Number one question I've been asked in Ann Arbor since I've been "back":
"Is it weird being back?" Hm... I'm guessing this may be an alternative question to "So how was it?"

To answer the question: Yes and no. Yes, there are some things I need to readjust and reacquaint myself with but simply, a year isn't long enough for me to forget American culture that easily. The weirdest part for me is that I returned exactly a year, to the day, from the time that I left America. In the church, the same things are going on: summer missions team is going at it full force, Excel Academy has started, LIFE groups are kicking it. Even the town is similar: the Ann Arbor Art Festival is underway, the weather is the same. So it almost feels like I've never left.

I have been spending a lot of time reconnecting with people and reaffirming my experiences, blessings, and lessons learned by sharing testimonies and finding listening ears to boast about God's goodness this past year.

Being thrown back into the reality of Ann Arbor life, especially since there are many things that are similar to years past, it seems like I've never left. So it is good that I am asked daily about my experiences in Indonesia, lest I forget too quickly. In order to solidify different convictions and lessons, I need to continue to reaffirm the positives and negatives about this past year - that they actually happened, and that they really are good, but not painting an unrealistic picture at the same time.

focus

(a repost from September 10, 2008)

Colonel McCoy, Commanding Officer 7th Marines, addresses a classroom full of Marines and CrossFit trainers on leadership. Below is an excerpt from his speech taken from crossfit.com


"To paraphrase: Your actions speak so loudly that your clients, your Marines, etc - they can’t hear what you’re saying.

We have a quote that we like to use from Pericles, 500 BC. 2500 years ago and it just shows you that human nature doesn’t change.

Of every 100 men in battle, 10 shouldn't even be there. 80 are nothing but targets. 9 are the real fighters and they make the battle. But 1 is a warrior and he brings the others home.

Our job as leaders and as trainers isn’t to develop those 9 as much, they’re already out there – you want to enable them. But our job, really, at the end of the day is to make those 80 fight like those 9, perform like those 9. And that comes through creating belief in themselves and in each other and holding themselves to a standard, accountable and transparent, to something bigger than themselves. And that’s what this [CrossFit] has done. This is the untapped potential. Those of us who don’t do that, in either the leadership or fitness industry, I will just say 'you will be the spectators to the slaughter of your people'. And that is the bottom line for us in combat, we can talk a good game but if were not doing it on the field every day and hoarding ourselves and inoculating ourselves to the stresses of combat, which is what CrossFit will do for you, then you WILL be spectators to the slaughter."

Loving people is messy... because we are messy. I am messy. But if we can all grasp unto this hope that we are made for something greater than ourselves and we have unimaginable potential.... that is people power.

Here's an excerpt from a New York Times interview with Tachi Yamada, M.D., president of the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation’s Global Health Program. Interview was conducted and condensed by Adam Bryant.

"It always comes down to people. One of the things I’ve learned is that you can’t go into an organization, fire everybody and bring in everybody you want. You have to work with the people you have. I’ve gone into different organizations in completely different walks of life several times, and you walk into the organization and you realize that some people are very good, some people are average and some people are not so good. And if I spend my time focusing on everything that’s bad, I’ll get nothing done.

Or I could say, what are really the best things about the people I have? What makes them great, and how can I really improve them one or two notches? And if I spend my time on that, then I’ll have a great organization. Everybody has their good points. Everybody has their bad points. If you can bring out the best in everybody, then you can have a great organization. If you bring out the worst in everybody, you’re going to have a bad organization."

Excellent interview, by the way. Check out the whole thing here.

Good reminders to love people. Not being nice to people, necessarily, but hoping for and bringing out the best in people. And being humble enough to realize that I don't necessarily know what the best is for me, and I don't know what the best is for others. It's tricky, it's messy, it's hard. I love it.

No Excuses: Taking the Shot

I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And this is why I succeed. - Michael Jordan

There are many times when I don't take that shot.

I like to know with 100% certainty that something will work or come out exactly like how I planned or wanted to. But limited only to my imagination and perspective, that kind of attitude can put a cap on potential and progress.

It is precisely when I am willing to make mistakes and begin the often painful process of learning from my mistakes that I actually make any kind of progress.

I played a game of basketball some time back. I left the game with regrets and an uneasy feeling of "Whew, I didn't screw up too bad". I missed some shots early in the game and had stopped shooting altogether. Other players, including my own teammates, told me, "Just stop shooting the ball if you can't make it." There was only one friend who kept encouraging me, "It's OK if you missed that one, keep taking that shot!"

Yes, I have to know my limits and have a sober judgment of myself. But if I don't keep trying and practicing during game time, then when will I ever learn to shoot a basketball under pressure?

However, I must remember that persistence without the right perspective is merely stubbornness. Trying again and again using the same methods is madness. That's why persistence and taking chances must be coupled with a constant evaluation and adaptation in order to improve oneself.

Am I ready to try new things and to try again if my original attempt didn't work? Am I ready for some humiliation, discouraging moments, and times when I feel like giving up? And when faced with all that, am I ready to suit up for the next round and take the shot? If chances aren't taken, then nothing happens.

Ready or not...

No Excuses: Adapt and Overcome

It's the Marine Corps mantra of "working through the problem" and given a situation, "adapting and overcome". The Marines are meticulous planners and we do our best to execute a mission. However, we also often say, "Semper Gumby". It's the ability to always stay flexible to the changing situation that can determine the success of a mission.



At points along the way, I get disheartened that conventional methods just don't always work out in new or different contexts. Tried and true ways that fail can cause me to think, "I can't" instead of "How can I punch through this?"

The past year, I grew increasingly frustrated at others who would quit too soon and too easily. One thing I kept hearing was, "No, sorry, I can't. It is impossible", when given some creativity and effort, the situation was actually not impossible.

Looking back on 2009, I realize that my frustration arose out of my own lack of creativity and my own quitter mentality.

Going into 2010, I need a fresh outlook. Sometimes a "fresh take" is looking around at what I have available to me and making the most of it instead of wishing I had something I can't get. That really gets me going, a pioneering spirit. That's why I think I'm a huge fan of MacGyver.



That's the kind of stuff that inspires me, riles me up. The "never quit" endurance and ingenuity that results from thinking that nothing is impossible.

On the physical side, I've really "let myself go" in the past year. Instead of thinking of new ways to work out outside of the conventional gymnasium, I felt lost without the neatly arranged dumbbells. This attitude was accentuated by my 14 day trial at a local fitness club, which was over-the-top: pumping with techno music, walled with mirrors, the latest weight machines and health tonics, all served by perfectly tanned physical trainers. It was "all that I could ask for", except that I grew sick of it. It was too contrived and formulaic... I didn't feel free to work out with the level of intensity and range of motion I wanted to. When in actuality, I am completely free to work out whichever I want to, I just didn't want to accept that freedom to think outside the box.

Adapt and overcome.